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Stranger danger
My, my, my
October.04.2006 - 7:51 PM
My stance on everything involved. A complete surrender to the mechanical
workings of all that is around me. A large machine with a microphone
input that I say everything in to and it spreads throughout the machines
circuitry. Major modules in the machines workings ripped out by choice
and not thrown on the ground and moved on from, but delicately handled
with every facet that is capable of being reviewed and examined and approved
by the most rigid quality control department you could ever imagine.
You see it has nothing to do with petty emotions. Get control of yourself
and your hormones. I used to wonder about the vicious things. The kind of
ignorant things that could be spewed. The hurtful things that only could
come from the lips of the selfish. The detailed plans drawn out in all the
possible configurations. Reviewing all that took place. Putting together
the pieces of things that are going on when brains are sitting placid.
Coming to the only conclusions that could possibly make sense. I think
about them as much as I think about the muscles it takes to chew or
how the hairs in my nose move when I breath. Breath deep.
You know what I saw walking down the street the other day? Muted, lifeless
and worthless pockets of air. It kills me. I inhale them and welcome the
dead air in to my lungs. Breath it in deep. It's at this point that basic
mathematics becomes a huge revelation. The people around me in every
pocket of my life that are completely oblivious to the sort of damage
they do. The people you destroy. How much pain you've caused. I am a
bad person because I don't give the change from my spending to the needy.
How lazy am I when the corporations make it so easy for you to give charity.
All you have to do is sign on a line and they will take small supplements
from you and make the quality of life for someone you will never meet a couple
pennies happier.
You saint! You will feed on the cream filed pie of life!
Your eyeballs are edible. As far as that thought might be from your mind
there is absolutely nothing stopping the devouring of your eyes except
the decency of your fellowman. The flesh of the beast is only favored
in chickens and potatoes. Freak.
All my friends are the best kind of strangers. I've eaten meals with them
like a family. I've crushed them with the palm of my hand and they have
returned the favor. I embrace them with the kind of hatred that only
a machine could understand. I don't eat their eyeballs. I have looked at
it from a complete breakdown of the scientific method and despite my
efforts I can find no way it would be appreciated.
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Been some time
Relate
February.21.2006 - 4:29 PM
My skin feels heavy. Like some Dali painting, except my skin is just fine
sitting on my muscle, fat and bones. My skin encompesses me. Keeps me
relatively warm and makes the bugs work a bit before getting to my succulent
innards.
There was a time I had a face. My arms, legs, feet and hands seem to
be hanging around no problem, but my most defining mark seems to have left
with a dull punctionation mark to replace it.
You have not been abandoned. Far from it. I wish I could say there is
an easy explination and put it in a well written verse punctuated with
ringing sharp notes. I wish things were as easy as a face to face transaction
with your local teller. You throw a million seeds in a field and no matter
how well you water it most of them are not going to make it. But those
that somehow do... They go on to make more seeds.
Look at this. Remember it? And that over there? It is still there...
looks a little different, sure. It may not be the same size and shape
but it is still there. Waiting.
Things with exoskeletons don't have lotions to replenish their weary
spots. Their sacriface is recognized all the same. Growth in armor plating
is a strenous thing. I can't imagine lack of moisture and fleshy comfort.
A luxary I won't take so lightly in the future.
This is a war. Fighting for sunshine. Feet planted in the ground and the
only thing to do is grow. Growing, growing, growing. Such a difficult
task with this mammoth creature casting a shadow.
This agency of money is doing nobody any good. The way we suckle it for
nutrishment has to be halted. My tounge is lacerated from trying to lick
around the metal cracks. Little dropplets like an unquestioned insurance scam.
Experience is nothing if it goes unused. Nothing is unused if it is
followed with experiences.
I can't understand settlements. Structures or reasonings with one another.
Foundations are created on seperatist communes. This planet earth is
running out of fresh dirt and the gaps are filling in. Such is my skin.
Such is your plating.
I read. I am what they call a reader. When people have their backs turned
that is. Despite this factual non-fictional fact. I find it hard to believe
when I see I am not reading. Who is talking about collections of papers?
Not me. And hopefully if you were paying attention neither were you.
I can't live a life where you see it. As much as my skin wants to be water and
form into a bowl my bones ache with such a stretch in character. Look at these.
They are eyes. Want to know where I found them? I can't tell you, but I
can show you where to look.
In skin.
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Ladies and Gentlemen... Welcome to the Macabre of Sylpher
Yucky
August.15.2005 - 6:41 PM
I would tear out your heart taking special care in not damaging the
precious aorta. Wrapping these around your wrist to bind you in a way
you couldn't bare to imagine like an incontrolable death grip on a tire
iron. I control this bottle, these organs of life and death only seperated
when steel (at a steal) is introduced.
A friend is someone who would kill themselves so you can collect on the
insurance. Noise and noise all around. These radio waves are hindered by
this distortion of my microwave cooking a MSG laced meal freeze dried in
Indianapolis. I don't want violence. I'll naw on my rib cage until those
precious tender loins are exposed. Feed on my own flesh in a final meal
uncooked white meat.
Dreams don't control me. Yes, they do. This ringing in my ear. The vibration
of a ceiling fan and the inaudible vibrations of energy at work.
You create this pinball. You create energy. Turning people into protons.
I'm so beat. this is the only way that I can understand how to express
a feeling without the need to create a house. This is not a reading by the person
who can create a sentence. This is not a creation of a worded house through which
a logical idea cna be presentend or represented and taken account for in a bank
account with a 300 over draft fee needing to be paid no matter the fault
of a man who no longer has anyt use for money. You fools. You live in your
room. You live in your room. You live in your doom.
The war has begun and the girls are losing. And the girls are loosing.
Stress on. Stress on you warrior. I can't control this sentence. I can't
control this... Bob.
falling down, without a sound, slip, and slin, and bine, the time of which
nobody named tim or Tim can tell the difference between nothing and nothing.
nothing and nothing. nothing and nothing. nothing and nothing. nothing and nothing.
nothing and nothing. Shut up. I don't need to make sense. Just, shut up. Shut
that bottom lip up. You vote. You voter.. I know you vote. I know you eat and I know
you vote. You voter. just shut up.
450, 150, 70, 80, 200, 120, 25, 120. 1215. 296 X 4. 1184. Sigh.
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I knew it.
Coughing?
July.24.2005 - 8:15 PM
I tripped over a house that I thought was a rock. I looked inside at
the little poeple and when i tried to shake their hands I crushed them.
I created 6 little holes in the ground 6 inches deep and buried them.
Who houses in a lounge of pillows? What did you call me? You
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It had to be done.
I know
June.30.2005 - 4:05 PM
It was 1:38 in the morning when you called. You knew I was sleeping, but
you called to say you love me and that you understand. My phone had
fallen behind the dresser and was muffled. I did not answer it. I did
not hear it. I was dreaming of a man in prison with a pet octopus he
would use to defend himself. He escaped prison and was killed. The man
who killed him went to prison. I confronted him on it and we wept as he told me
he had to do it and I understood.
It all started when I was younger. I was fascinated and that is all.
Have you ever been so full of liquid if you shake you can hear it but
you still thirst?
I run as fast as I can to avoid casting a shadow. The sun is crafty.
I have passing waves of obsessive compulsive attacks when you are near me.
How selfish and immature.
When extreme amounts of pain are enforced on someone do they welp out of
reflex or reaction? You are only as good as your surroundings. I can
create a nutritional meal that could be swallowed in one bite and miss out
on life. I can swallow life and miss out on creating a nutritional meal.
I can't control mater, but I can reroute it.
Too many factors are going unnoticed here. How can you be so foolish? How
can you ignore temperature, air pressure, altitude? How can you equate
beauty with shape? How can you be so foolish?
It was 2:15 when you called again. My phone hadn't moved and niether had
I.
Angst aside, I will never face you. I will never truly understand where
your demons hide and why your actions shaped my mater. You scoff, and
push aside. Humor is a mean defense mechanism. Why do you abuse me so?
I used to sleep on the lawn. Work over night and have restless sleep.
Play board games and eat potato chips. Passive agressive tendencies
against anything thrown my way. Throw fits at discomfort and pout when
offended. Never understood how to control a conversation and never let
things get confrontational. Cower at anger and fume at injustice. Complain
for show and tolerate being sawed off at the knee. Drink caffeine by the gallons.
Justify rather then stand up. Support faceless ideas. Luminate at the idea
of escape. Day dream of composure. Night dream of glass. Regret regretting.
Wipe my nose on my arm. Run away to friends houses. Get wordy when I want
to confuse. Control time. Think a lot of the same thoughts you do, but
don't talk about. Think of how silly I was when a solution to something
that seemed complex was simple. Hate the way I was treated. Consume vast
amounts of negativity to avoid it. Hold you down stuburnly. Pull punches.
Watch Fraggle Rock. Memorize everything in a room including placement and
levels of dust. Over analyze the placement of words. Wish I would find
someone who fits just right. Not mind being taken advantage of. Stumble
over words at very bad times.
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Don't bother reading this.
The morning after.
April.30.2005 - 10:52 AM
The streets are littered with the hearts of children. Thousands upon
thousands of blood pumps scattered in a gory ocean of memories. I am
exhausted, but what is worse, still breathing.
The bodies are left to be discovered one by one in their own story
waiting to be told. My story begins with a taxi.
While driving at night if you see a car without it's headlights on it
is customary to flash your lights to let them know something is wrong.
While I was driving at night a taxi was behind me. Glancing in the
mirror I noticed his headlights were off. Trying to think of a way to
let him know he slipped away and turned. I knew this was symbolic, but
wasn't sure as to what.
Why should I explain it to you? You would only use it to your advantage.
Find another way to wriggle your finger in a loose piece of skin and
start peeling some more.
Then there is you. Of course, you. You would nod your head, blank stare
attached, and give me nothing in return. You would be the half-empty
suitcase that everything I need to take is too large to fit in. You
are never home when you think you are. And when you are, it is the last
place you want to be.
The children cause me depression attacks that all of modern medical
science couldn't dull in 1,500 mg. But, I will continue to lay here on
my 15 ft. self-prescribed and weather-tattered leash. Waiting for
someone to come to my aid because I am much too proud and stubborn to
go looking.
These activities are not healthy despite what any psychologist says.
Despite what any sane and good natured friend, and most importantly...
despite what you tell yourself.
I think I'll prop my head against this staircase so I can get a better
perspective as to why nobody ever does. Except for the children. How
quickly you forgot the children. If I could only see past the ceiling
maybe I could understand this situation better. If I cleaned my glasses,
ate a good meal and got a decent nights rest; I could have a fresh mind
ready to decipher how much pain was caused through inactions and negligence
of the obvious.
Common sense is what lacks in the man who is still fuming hours after
a disagreement.
I need more. That is the glutton. Convincing isn't it? I patched myself
up with some clothing off my friend whose carcass is rotting only steps
away. He wasn't using it. I bet he doesn't use his heart either. Is it
wrong though? Is it? Can anyone answer my question when you don't even
know what I am asking? STOP READING THESE.
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Littered with this verse
I lost
April.28.2005 - 7:37 PM
I must apologeize. Today was not a day to take a walk, but I did anyways.
I passed every single road that I usually take and realized that this whole
town is not doing anyone any favours.
This battle feels more like an onslaught and I'm playing catcher. Off with
you, foul spirit. I can't see you but I feel you and you are not welcome
in my temple. I can spin on my heels all I want, who knew you were so
crafty? I can't approach you. I'm not scared I am just broke. How can
you expect someone to be understanding. Expectations are a wicked tool.
I got rid of my toolbox.
You should converse with strangers more. Stranger Danger or not you will
be a better person. Say hello to the next person you see that you don't
know. If they are rude at least you weren't. Six, oh how you allude me.
You are a dainty kitten and short on all fronts.
The left hand is a sneaky killer. The right is a bumbling fool. However,
he can crush a hand with little effort. The innocence of a mouse is
confused in the heart of a man who lives day by day. Who wants to dance?
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Why don't you die?
Doesn't look like you are busy with anything else.
April.23.2005 - 6:28 AM
Look at you and your overweight heart. I wonder how you look when you
wake up, when your inflamation is present. I bet you have goals... I bet
you wake up in the morning content but eager. What are they, though?
What do you mean by nice? I can smell the condescension emitting from your
pores. You are digusting... your pealing skin and unused cells are present
to the minds eye and when it all catches up to you I just hope you realize
what you have done to yourself and can get over it. Which you won't.
I was awoken by a ghost today. The asexual being told me that unless I
start crawling I will never reach the peak. I thanked it, gave it a glass
of milk and pushed it out the window.
If I had a garage sale and sold everything that is important to me I wonder
how much I would get out of it. What is the price tag on my things now compared
to 500 years from now? Who can see in 4 demensions..
I threw a gernade and it didn't blow up. I don't think I'll go near it
anytime soon. I filled a bucket full of water, vinegar and apple juice
and threw it on a canvas. It didn't explode either, but now I have to find
something else to fill this bucket with. Good thing I drink a lot of water.
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Craving
Motivation on heroine
April.20.2005 - 7:42 PM
As the sun fades we find a new way to live. The consumer of light makes
his way on a gold bursting chariot moving across the landscape. Time
waits for no man, or so they say. I find myself constantly waiting for
time. I feed on seconds like salty snacks until a conquest for something
to moisten my palette is a way of life. Who confuses this need for
sustenance? I know I do. This character, main or otherwise, has no life.
You will attack him cause of it.. Oh yes you will.
I have read my life plan. I went over the calculations time and time
again, yet it just doesn't add up. Every formula leads to the same
outcome. Guess who just discovered destiny? I found her under my car
partially melted to the over heating parking lot. I have seen this movie
before. I have read this book and I have seen the after school special.
Even still I am a deer in the head lights. What good is a mountain
inside of a valley?
I can separate into 9 pieces. I've done it before. I never knew it was a
talent until I met you. Until I met your ways… the way you love to
attack nicely. Your strategy is incredible. I can't stand you.
Stay tuned this was all just a test. I found a man willing to free me,
but he was under house arrest. As sure as I am that the heavens will
fall and all I love will soon fade away. I dance in the morning hours
alone prepared to eat this day. Read these writings, search and wonder,
is this the work of madness? One day when I am more prepared you will
understand unjustifiable sadness.
Sometimes when it is crowded I take a seat besides myself, cause I know
a conversation has to emerge sooner or later. I tell him about the times
we used to spend with pen and paper. Hours upon hours that breed
something more and at the same time something less. I found all these
pieces laying around. How careless of me to be so unorganized. Thank you
for your concern, even though it only makes matters worse.
You don't understand me, my writings, my life, my thoughts, my opinions,
my goals, my hopes and my dreams. If you did you wouldn't be scared of
anything here. Cause everything here has been here all along and if this
was a sign of something to come. Some end to come, and you know exactly
what I am talking about, it would have happened a long time ago.
I found something. It consumes me and my time and my thoughts and my
dreams. A normal life is nice and I can see that path over there… Looks
quite nice. It isn't mine though. I see my path. I see my tragic, heart
strung path that will produce works I can finally be proud of and in the
end… the final end. Will consume more then MY time, MY thoughts and MY
dreams.
Good night, the consumer is here for you. Good morning heartache. I've
missed you so…
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Assisted wake up
Green yellow red.
April.14.2005 - 7:46 PM
One day while walking through the woods I found an old and well known
path. With nothing better to do I followed it. It brought me to places
I never knew existed.
One day while walking through the woods I met a man that when he spoke
the repetitious folds of skin vibrated.
One day while walking through the woods I paid my taxes and it didn't bother
me. That was only for one day.
One day while walking through the woods I found out that the things you
talk about least to the people that are closest to you is the source of
every single problem you have and will eat your soul until you are a
worthless scab gyrating on the bathroom floor.
One day while walking through the woods I found out that sometimes your
favorite shirt needs to be sacrificed for a greater cause.
One day while walking through the woods I came upon a river flowing
with metal and a range of personalities that only come out after a numbing
drink.
One day while walking through the woods I commited genocide.
The beast was silenced, but I will say it gave everything it had in that
final attack. How do you expect something that powerful to survive with
so many evil spirits with oversized weapons around every corner. I'm not
going to starve to death. I am well nurished, but I'll tell you this much...
My animals are dying.
You missed it! He layed it out flat in front of your face. All you had to
do is pay attention and everyone I cared about had to suffer and now I
got this duffle bag full of toys that one by one I have to take out and
play with until I figure out its magic and it is no longer fun anymore.
If I ever left I wonder who would take possesion of my... possesions.
Never forget my possesions cause they will forget about me.
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Ointment sustains
At least you have relief
March.16.2005 - 7:01 PM
It didn't work out. My back has been exposed and the lack of proper
cleaning habits has been unleashed. Who would have thought that to maintain
you had to have a mirror. Knowing what you are not is NOT the same as knowing
what you are.
I severed my other leg. This was before, before, before I found another
horse... They are not related.
I am a superhero. Call me Todd and expect to accept that I can infact dish
out a healthy serving of chaos and disorder. Once I am finished. One I am
finished. Once I am finished. Once I am finished. Once I am Finished. Once
I am finished. Once I am finished. Once I am finished.
Oh the irony!
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ABC
DEFG
March.16.2005 - 6:59 PM
It has gotten to the point that if music was extracted from the earth
it would be completely uninhabitable.
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How tragic
They don't even see it.
March.06.2005 - 7:26 PM
Who has a need for being literal? I can't control you, but for the
very short time it takes your brain to process these words I am saying,
I have an opportunity to change your mind. You are not read-only when
it comes to these words and whether you like it or not I will write some
data to you. I will control even an indistinguishable percentage of your mind.
What to do with such power? A tragedy is going to happen. He is strong
and able to handle any of lifes great tests, but this is a burden no
person should bare. Maybe it is a blessing that he won't be around to try
and bare it.
When I got up today there was a large hole in the living room. I rearranged
the funiture and tried to make it less noticable like that stain in the
carpet that you try and avoid. Didn't work.
They noticed. I could see it in their faces. How do you explain it? I
can't control your explosions. What will calm this sea? How long before
the anger subsides and the son comes out to play. I mean the sun... Or do I?
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I found a lost toy.
Still works.
February.27.2005 - 12:16 PM
I read something the other day. You are weak. That isn't what I read.
Who are you? Who am I addressing? Am I addressing you now when I say
you? Who you? Who knew? I know! Ha, what control. You will never understand.
No. Not you, you, you, you, or you. Who read first, the teacher or the
student?
I can't control explosions like I wish I could. Condensed pressure working
against a liberating wish. Who owns this book? Who owns this kind of control
over the place I call home. I can't even walk outside anymore... who knows
who could be watching.
She loves you. She hates you. She bares no burden of emotion for the ways
you address authority, nor the size of your eyes in the morning light. Who
could attack me now? I have the largest army of all nations. Who speaks
in tounges in a time of need. I have no reason to be direct to a person
who listens for selfish reasons.
That anger approachs and it is enough to make me leave this town. Pack
up and hit the road for the sand. Find adventures in the wilted snow
lands of a better... of just a better.
I can't win this way. They are going to color over his works and erase
him from existence. Who has found mortality besides the godfather of robots?
She left you because you didn't listen. Don't look at your future as
a burden. He will grow up to be the greatest anomaly ever in all existence.
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The shadow has a bell
Plays it like monopoly.
February.16.2005 - 6:41 PM
I didn't leave my land, I was forced out. Governmental bodies turning
a cold shoulder to the farmers kicked off their land in the name of
progress. My animals need me! THEY ARE DYING! My crops weep at the sound
of your industry.
Mothers teach their children to be nice and kind, until they get to the
counter of an unreasonable associate. I am not a ninja!
These sounds lately can't control my sinister side. I am in total
seclusion when the best of me can't see the worst. This cave is growing
darker the deeper I crawl. I smelt. I am insincere when it is needed
most.
Did you know there is a mountain in Iran that contains a demon? I can't
stand your lack of control. This is my analogy of a metaphor. You are
a 13.8 inch hole with a drain the size of a pin prick. A slow drain in
need of constant filling. It will kill you one day. You will work harder
then you ever needed to keep yourself full until you finally die. I
wish you would try.. the myriads of worlds that could be unvieled. You
will never know the differnce between a frozen orange and a cooked ham.
Mercy killing is okay until emotions get involved. Your mother is calling.
Be kind, oxygen is watching.
My butterfly is not a 13.8 inch hole.
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I'm sleeping
Don't attack me.
January.17.2005 - 7:57 PM
Where are all these people? They breath air and I hope eat now and then,
but I can't see them. I put up the balloons and decorate around the place
waiting with visible excitement for their arrival and nothing. I want
to converse with them, feel thier presence and maybe even cook them a
small meal with a little too much butter, but they will play it off like
as if that is how they like it because they are more concerned about me
then my cooking skills.
What good people they are, they make me proud to be alive. Take in a full
amount of oxygen in the morning and exhale it cause I know another one is
coming soon. Dare I be literal? Who wants to attack this sleeping Sylpher?
You have the oppertunity, shall you seize it? I sometimes wonder while
not in the company of people if anyone will ever understand anything I
say here. The ability is there, of course, but will they?
Children recognize me. I know why now.
You gave me my box, why? Riddles aside does this really prove that actions
speak louder then words. I don't think you care. When will this vessel
reach its destination is your burning question. My mountain is not rid
of evil and I will fight on it until the very day it throws me in my grave
or I conquer it and build my castle. Will you be invited in? Will my princess
be in another castle? My kingdom does not lay back and watch the day pass
over anymore. These people will be lead with the animals and moon until
the very extinction of color. You will not exist when this is finished.
You will not own a single scrap of knowledge that is passed on through the
very language known as the metaphor.
You have no animals. Buy a rabbit, consumer.
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